Other Observations:
Ryan: “Some Sake is cloudy. But the cloudy thing has no credence.”
[Editor’s Note: ???]
EXPLANATIONS AND ANALYSIS:
The Frog One:
Tom: “I was expecting this one to be better. I mean, it’s got a gold frog on the bottle.”
How the Throw Up One got its name:
Ryan: “I’m pretty scared of this one. The nose on this one alone…it smells like squirrel throw up.”
(Tom tastes it): “It tastes like throw up, too.”
Andrew: “It looks like it’s in a Hypnotic bottle.”
Ryan: “Frog sake is great compared to the Throw Up sake.”
How the Good One got its name:
Ryan: “The Good One is good.”
Jonathan: “Cheap vodka’s still easier to drink than this stuff.”
Ten minutes later…
Ryan: “The good sake is delicious!”
(The group nods, politely.)
The Floral One:
Ryan: “This is awful.”
Andrew: “It’s good, right!”
Tom: “How did we manage to get five bad bottles of sake?”
Jonathan: “I don’t know, by buying five bottles at convenience stores maybe?”
Andrew: “This one reminds me of something I ate at the Sushi place.”
Everyone: “It’s terrible.”
Andrew: “I think we just need to heat it up. It’ll be even better.”
Ryan: “If heating all this stuff up makes it way better, then none of us are getting up in the morning to ski. Or if we do, I’m definitely going to hit a tree.”
We decided to roll the dice:
Consensus?
It wasn’t better.
Max Valu Convenience Store Sake VS. Seico Mart Convenience Store Sake:
In what turned out to be our most definitive pronouncement of the evening, we decided that all Seico Mart sake is terrible, that you should always purchase your sake at Max Valu. This was based pretty exclusively on the fact that we happened to buy the Jar of Sake there, which Ryan fell in love with.
Ryan: “The jar sake is amazing.”
But Then…
Ryan: “Wait, are we sure that the jar of sake is even sake? We might be drinking something that’s not actually sake….”
Tom: “I was wondering the same thing. I think we’re just pounding wine right now.”
And that is when it really dawned on me: maybe we shouldn’t actually be reviewing sake. (Or whatever it was we were drinking.)
Since you guys are stalwartly refusing to include any road bike reviews, I’m glad you are at least keeping me very entertained. Thanks :)
After this sake review, I’m shocked (but appreciative) that you still want us to review anything!
Except for the jar (which is sake), I think you guys might have been drinking shochu.
Schochu, huh? We’ll have to investigate further. (Then again, maybe it’s best if we don’t investigate any further at all….)
You have convinced me that I should never, under any circumstances, drink sake (let alone learn anything about sake). This is interesting, because I would think that your reviews should inform people about things and make them want to try stuff out.
Tom – if you were under the impression that we knew what we were talking about, I could see how this review might convince you never to try sake.
But if you are still under the impression that we know anything about sake, well, then you have bigger issues to face than whether or not to try sake.
I would like to add that I didn’t find anything wrong with drinking whiskey and sake in the same evening. Although I feel that I have to mention that I do not remember most of this evening of sake reviewing. Actually the only pure memory of the whole trip was the crazy amount of snow.